I was at work today hanging out with my boss, we got on to the topic of weight loss and positive thinking... To sum it up my boss thinks i need to have more of a positive attitude towards some goals that i would like to achieve, mainly weight loss... She wasent being rude by any means, more caring then anything.. I'm the 1st to admit that i am very negative when it comes to weightloss.. I guess i feel this way because i have tried over and over again and i always end up giving up.. In a way i have learned to accept myself the way that i am... The funny thing is I am not happy with the way i am and nor do i want to accept it... Sometimes giving up just seems so much easier then trying... After leaving work for the day i have done a lot of thinking and i cant seem to get the discussion out of my head... She was totally right, i am negative about weight loss and if i put my mind to it i can do anything... Why am i settling for something that i dont want?
Here's a paragraph i found that i thought was quite interesting...
A negative attitude is self-defeating. We won’t find solutions to life’s problems by looking for someone or something to blame. Those who say, "Positive thinking doesn't work for me," have got it backwards. It’s not positive thinking that has to work; YOU have to work. For example, you have to work at appreciating what you have instead of moaning about what you lack.
From now on i am going to try and wake up every morning and think positive, instead of complaining about every day life im going to appreciate the things i have and work harder at achieving my goals....
Last night was a very interesting night indeed!! My friend Jenn and I took her Mom out to celebrate her Birthday.. She had no idea where we were taking her. Man was she in for a Big surprise....... She kept trying to guess, she thought for sure it was the strippers but she was wrong... Once we pulled up to the building she seen 2 men walk in and says to me "Hollz those 2 men looked as if they were gay" I then said "whatever!! how do gay people look?" We walked up to the building a little nervous bcuz this was new for all of us.. Once we walked in we paid our cover and she ask's the man where the hell she is.... lol she finally found out that we were at a gay bar to see a drag show..
I have nothing against gays but we thought it would be good for a laugh.. Once i sat down and started watching the show i couldn't believe my eyes, it was very interesting yet weird at the same time.. I couldn't believe the body on this one guy, it was smokin!!!!
I felt kind of out of place there, I'm sure nobody cared but i just felt as though people were looking at me thinking why is she here?! Actually all of us felt that way... It was definitely an experience.. The funny thing is we ran into a guy from high school there who is gay and said that he use to be a dancer at that same bar but he gave it up...
i dunno, all i can say is that it was just a weird night,
This one above is the one with the killer body and he could also dance awesome....
We didnt stay to long, only had one drink, watched a few dancers then left.. We wanted to go somewhere where we felt a little more comfortable...
In the back of my mind I always knew i should have gone back to say my goodbyes..
When i started my new job taking care of children i just kind of left the retirement home that i was working at... Sure i went back to visit once and a while but not enough... In some ways i stopped going back because it was to hard for me to see these people that I had grown so attached to through out the year i was there.. I mean you know eventually that they are going to pass away and its just a matter of time right?! When it came down to getting close to my residents and truly caring for them the fact that they were going to die soon wasent a factor in my mind and heart.. This is the problem with working in health care.. You see people die day in and day out and in all honesty its very depressing... When I was in school my teacher couldnt stress enough about not getting close to the residents.. (ya like that was goin to happen) How do you not get close to someone who is a beautiful person inside and out? Or what about if that person has nobody at all but you? No family to come and visit them, no friends, no one at all, How would they feel? How would you feel if that were you?
I've always been a sucker for getting really close to people, I'm not ashamed of it, that just me and I've got a big heart....
Tonight I heard some awful news.. One of my old residents passed away the other day from a heart attack. She was truly an amazing person, so caring and gentle.. I loved her so much..
Its been a while since ive posted, It seems as though I've been quite the busy girl... Work is the same, I am still working LONG crazy hours and have no life except for on the weekends... Every weekend is always full of things to do therefor i dont find much time to blog anymore... Ever since Joe and I have moved into our own house we always have friends over to party and enjoy one another's company... Last saturday we finally had our housewarming party, It was great, alot of people showed up and I hadn't had that much fun in a long time.... Hella and i made some goodies for the party like Jello shooters....
My 1st punch.....
My punch turned out pretty good, i was a bit worried because it was the 1st time making it and all but it was all gone by the morning time so im assuming people enjoyed it:) I didnt really drink a whole lot of it though because of the amount of sugar in it... (oh the joys of having diabetes) Thats ok i was quite content with my rum and cokes:)
hahahah i think this picture says it all, i dont know what kind of dance moves i was doing but it looks like im doing a Ho down lol....
We were all bustin a move that night
All in all the night was great, Lots of friends, booze and good music, sometimes that all you need:)
Most of the time when you have a party something breaks or booze gets knocked over and so on.. Theres no way you can have a house full of drunks and nothing happen.. In my situation, there was a WHOLE lot of spillage....
The friday (day before my party) i had got a new couch off a friend of mine, it wasent brand new but it was new to me and it was in mint condition... I was happy to get this couch before my party because i needed another one so people would have somewhere to sit... We set it up in my living room and it looked and still does look great!!
I was in the kitchen the night of my party chatting with some friends and drinking my face off when i heard a HUGE bang come from my living room...
OH SHIT!!!
This is what i walk in to.......
Ok as pissed as i was the next morning this was the funniest shit i had seen all night... Look at my carpet and my couch, it was covered in candle wax, beer and all kinds of other drinks, there was chips all over the place and god only knows what else... The funny thing is if you look at the pic, he still is holding his beer... lol I'm just glad that the table didn't break as he fell on it because the top is all glass and he could have really hurt himself.... Later on in the night i started cleaning up the floor, i didn't know that my "new" candle had fell and there was broken glass all over the floor as well.. As i was sliding my hand across the carpet trying to get all the little crumbs of chips i cut my finger open on a big piece of glass..... OUCH!!!!
Of course being the baby that i am I start freaking out.... I was bleeding a lot because i was drinking of course and the thought of the blood was making me freak out a hell of a lot more then i needed to.... Its a good thing i have good friends that take care of me:) But man how embarrassing!!!!!
